New Beginnings

Blending families

We often speak of blended families following divorce. Widowhood and remarriage offers all those opportunities for challenge, change, and grace.  One difference is often overlooked.  Widowhood means less rejection, and sometimes less pain bring into the new relationship.   Yet honoring memories of that past marriage can be important and misunderstood.  Yes, I encourage lots of communication and lots of grace.  Yet, remembering is a necessary part of healing.  Children, in laws, and past friends are impacted.  Each needs to know they are whole as God’s creation, secure in His love first.  That’s freedom to not cling possessively to that […]

Honoring someone you love(d)

I’m often asked by a widow or widower who has remarried, “How do I honor my first husband, or my first wife.”  Its complicated.  Sometimes our new spouse feels offended, or that the new relationship is Less, rather than just different.     I advise setting aside that day without your current spouse, an anniversary, a birthday, or some significant day, to honor and grieve your first spouse alone.  You might go to a special place you enjoyed together.  Some invite one of their children, or close friend.   One remarried widow took her two children and her first husbands […]

New mission

Do you have a new mission, a new passion?  You are eager to pursue it.  A popular leader once asked, “What are you willing to leave behind in order to get where you want to go?”   Time, energy, funds, Widow Connection is my passion.  Being widowed and single, I could remarry.  I chose, as Paul did, to remain single.  I can be devoted with my calendar, energy, focus on the mission I’m called to do.   Do you wish to be a more dedicated parent?  You’ll need to leave behind for a season as least, some of your solo […]

Peace during conflict

We wish for peace.  We pray for peace.  That prayer will only be answered in Heaven.  Yet, we are promised the possibility of peace on earth in our hearts and minds if not our country, our world.  Since conflict is a reality what is our foundation of peace?   It’s our sure knowledge of justice.  Even if justice does not prevail in our location, our time, it will in Heaven.  History shows that countries experience greater peace when justice is present and fair.  Read Judges 6.  Gideon’s experience was conflict.  But God asked him to act.  He did.  He acted […]

Summer memory

Summer has taken wings leaving us with days packed with plans and surprises.  What is your favorite memory?  I’ve saved a newspaper article  dated Friday, June 16, 2017 with an oversize picture that I treasure.  National Park in Washington D.C. not packed with protesters but democrats and republicans on bended knees praying together.   One shooter showed up to kill republicans practicing days before for a baseball game.  Capitol police prevented that but not before several were wounded.  A day of tragedy brought unity.  On game day, the charity event went on, but not as usual.  People of great differences […]

Obsolete 2

Change.  How important is the neighborhood mail box today?  Millennials may never have noticed one.  College text books?  A shrinking market.  Its all on the net.  Consider the church.  Small churches consolidated to become megachurches. A benefit was supposedly that you could attend anonymously. Now there is a growing movement to house churches. Small, folks knowing each other.  The church experiences change.  But one thing is constant.  The purpose is to grow disciples.  That happens through more than teaching.  Connection, accountability, being known.  Jesus mirrored that with his disciples.  The Apostle Paul describes this in Acts. Churches need not fear […]

Snails and cheetahs

Noah’s ark is sometimes referred to as an illustration of God making a way of salvation and safety.  He is no respecter of persons, Galatians 2: 4.  His provision is equally available to all. All animals were represented in the ark.  Consider that both snails and cheetahs entered the ark and were safe through the flood.   I find that comforting.  Comparing snails and cheetahs would be ridiculous.  They were in the ark for a purpose unrelated to their speed.  Why, within the body of believers do we compare?  And rank what’s important?  We’re here for God’s purposes.  He values […]

Obsolete

Do you remember when we needed house keys and you rented movies from a store in a mall? Phones had cords attached and were stationary.  Change is ever present and we adjust.  I learned to drive an old Jeep with a clutch peddle.  Thankfully the clutch is becoming obsolete, and we won’t miss it.   Consider that our privacy is becoming obsolete.   Not really.  Everything about us has always been known to God.  Each act whether we think it well hidden or not, even how many hairs we have on our head or used to have, is known to […]

Greatest chapter of your life

Our culture is fast paced and seldom encourages reflection.  Its wise at times to look back at our life path.  Contemplate what we’ve learned from our journey.  What has been the greatest chapter of your life?   No doubt it impacted your life path. Moving to a different state for work or college?  Marriage perhaps?  Marrying a solid man of faith, I was able to thrive in a secure space of acceptance, encouraged to grow spiritually.  Yet, that chapter had challenges, unexpected surprises, not all of them welcome.  The greatest chapter of your life sometimes has periods of deep pain. […]

Greatest Day

What was the greatest day of your life?  Wedding day?  Birth of a child?  A graduation or recognition of achievement?  No doubt you prepared for that day.   Time, effort, sacrifice, investment.  You prepared!  You made lists, purchased with intent and research, focused purposefully.   Consider that none of those days will compare with the day that you come face to face with Jesus.  Yes, each human will do that.  We prepare intentionally, some in open rejection, some in ignoring that possibility, and some of us in positive anticipation.  Accepting the reality of his sacrifice means no fear.  Recognizing the extreme […]

Trust and verify

Ronald Reagan liked to quote a Russian proverb that stated ‘Trust, but Verify.’  Good practice. The concept did not originate with the Russian proverb.  Acts 17: 11 described how one group listened to the gospel.  Now the Berean Jews were of more noble character than those in Thessalonica, for they received the message with great eagerness and examined the Scriptures every day to see if what Paul said was true.   How important for us today.  Tweets, speeches, sermons, there’s plenty of false teaching and fake news to go around.  Solution.  Personally, alone before the Lord, open Bible, read, review, […]

Be Happy

A vintage woman I see regularly is perpetually smiling.  It’s catching.  I know her life has its struggles.  I asked her, why are you always smiling?  She told me her childhood story.  Every morning her mother sang with her, Sing and be happy, a Happy Hank song I believe.  They sung it in very hard family times.  An abusive father, no profession of faith, life was hard.   I’m not saying we need to just smile through everything.  Being real and shedding tears are important.  I do know that a song in the morning sets your day.  I sing Make […]