I met LaSandra two years into her widow journey.  So young!  Four children in all out energy mode!  She had a quiet peace and resolve even in those days of continual change.  Read on and be inspired.

In 1997, Kenneth Hutchinson began to sit behind me in our World History class. I had known Kenneth was smart and articulate, but I had yet to find out how hilarious he was. Oh, but after he began to sit behind me in class. There were jokes for days!

He was sitting behind me whispering the jokes so only I could hear them. Jokes about the teacher, jokes about our classmates, jokes, jokes, and more jokes. I had to work hard to pretend like I was not distracted as he had me laughing so hard I would nearly be falling out of my desk chair onto the floor. And so, a friendship was born.

Occasional phone conversations around school projects eventually turned into late night conversations about how we both wanted to change the world in a BIG way. We were both passionate about social justice and wanted to work to address issues of inequality. I did not know that these conversations would be the beginning of a 20 year friendship and a 13 year marriage.

Kenneth and I went on to attend college together at Northwestern University. We married on campus three weeks before graduation on June 5, 2004. We pursued our dreams, worked in ministry together, and added to our family four beautiful children by 2011.

Kenneth went on to champion work in the education sector, becoming a national voice on college access. He was highly pastoral and held back nothing when it came to helping others reach their full potential. He was a wonderful husband and very proud to be a father to his children. He prayed for our children, did homework with them, sang with them, and spoke life and destiny over each one.

In January 2015, Kenneth was diagnosed with cardiomyopathy and he passed away two years later in October 2017. His work was acknowledged by the Chicago community in a huge way and featured in the Chicago Tribune and on abc channel 7 news.

At a loss for what to do next, I wanted to hold onto my faith, to honor God, to honor my husband and all that we had worked on together. I wanted to grow and flourish even in the midst of my pain. Thus, I began to use a love I had for writing to write stories about my husband on facebook to expound upon the kind of man he was and on how I believed God would continue to be faithful to me as a widow and now single mom of four children. Many were encouraged by my writing and encouraged me to keep going. A friend suggested I also share via a YouTube channel and from there, Grace & Grief was born!

My YouTube channel was featured by abc channel 7 news, podcasts, and a magazine for widows. I also began to be asked to speak publicly about my experience and I have spoken at a variety of conferences and events on how to grow through grief and recreate a powerful life after loss. I also began supporting people from all kinds of backgrounds and experiences with loss through grief coaching – assisting them in tailor-made strategies for how they can grow through grief and recreate life after loss.

Grace & Grief hosted its first conference in August 2019. The conference is called Rebirth Conference and it is a one-day restorative event for anyone who has experienced devastating loss including as a result of death, divorce, health issues, financial loss, abuse, etc. The overall goal was not to only equip the participants with much needed tools and resources, but to stir up hope and an atmosphere of love for the brokenhearted. The conference was a great success and many intend to return this year for the 2020 Rebirth Conference in September!

One of the greatest inspirations to me on this journey has been the example, wisdom, and work of Miriam Neff. A friend blessed me with her book; “From one Widow to Another: Conversations on the New You” only a couple of weeks after the loss of my husband and the book helped give me hope that I could have a healthy, impactful life even after loss. It is important to have others you can look up to on this journey so you can get a sense of what is possible.

To whoever may read my story, please know you are not alone. You are loved and you are stronger than you think. Although you may be very afraid and uncertain, you will grow as you move through each step. Take risks and know that although one beautiful season has ended, another beautiful season is just beginning.

Learn more about Grace & Grief here: https://www.graceandgrief.com