Meeting with a group of military widows, I listened to their stories and the cries of their heart in their new life alone. The list of how we can help could be long. I’ve tried to condense those into these 9 tips:   1. Stay connected. They loose much of their ‘community’ without the military connection of their husbands. Even in their church, many feel invisible. A likely geographical move may heighten their sense of isolation at this vulnerable time. 2. Please don’t judge me! Grief makes any widow feel crazy at times, and behavior–well–emotions are intense. Decisions are influenced […]

1. Please do stay connected. There is already a huge hole in our universe. Do not assume we need ‘space’ to grieve. 2. Please do say you are sorry for our loss. We would rather you tell us you do not know what to say than tell us your story of loosing your friend or even close relative We may be able to listen to your story later, but not now. Do not tell us you understand. 3. Do call and ask specifically, “Can we go for a walk together? May I run errands for you? Meet you for coffee? […]

My applause to you for wanting to reach out! One of the most frequently asked questions coming in my email is “How can I start a widows ministry?” While most of you asking the question are widows, several are not and just care about us! I am going to offer suggestions from four viewpoints: A widow who wants to start a group with church support A widow who wants to start a group on her own or with another organization A person who cares about us and wants to start a group with church support A person who cares about […]

To Reach Out: Please say “I remember.” We love to hear tender, funny, and just interesting things about the one we lost from your perspective. Let go of your expectations: yourself and others. Invite us out to anything. Be specific example – do you want to go with me (date and time) to the new Arboretum exhibit, new breakfast restaurant, etc. Ask if there is anything in particular we’d like to do with someone joining. Just keep asking and inviting if we’re not ready or able to. It’s nice to be asked. It’s OK to say that you just don’t […]

800,000 join our ranks annually. We are a fast growing demographic noticed by new home builders and a lucrative niche for health and beauty products. We are invited to dinners by financial planners and surveyed by designers for home features that will convince us to sign on the dotted line. In contrast, one pastor described us by saying we moved from the front row of church to the back row of church and then out the door. We moved from singing and serving to solitude and silent sobbing, and then on to find a place we belong. Scripture says the […]

    An excellent resource for single parents, as well as families with Moms and Dads. Widows Christian Place This blog provides resources and Biblical direction for finding your way through one of life’s most difficult challenges.   Prayer requests, resources, and connecting with other widows.     Training men to meet long term needs with long term ministry. Pleading the case of, providing assistance to and promoting the spiritual growth & ministry of widows since 1987. Margaret Nyman’s blog: http://www.gettingthroughthis.com http://thomrainer.com/2016/02/seven-reasons-why-your-church-should-have-a-ministry-to-widows/

The following are resources that may be helpful with issues we face. If you can recommend others, please contact us at miriam@widowconnection.com.   Griefshare GriefShare is a friendly, caring group of people who will walk alongside you through one of life’s most difficult experiences. You don’t have to go through the grieving process alone. The Better Business Bureau BBB provides information on over 2.5 million organizations. Check them out before you invest or give. File a complaint if you think you have been treated unfairly. They contact the organization to help resolve the issue. I found the online method quite […]

If you recently lost someone you love, the very last thing on your mind should be your current finances. Fortunately, there could be assistance available for you and your family. Widows are able to receive benefits on behalf of a deceased spouse through the Social Security Administration (SSA). Here are a few steps you can take to quickly determine whether or not you qualify for Social Security survivor benefits:   Step One: Determine if your spouse worked enough for you to qualify. If your husband passed away, he must have been working for you to receive survivors’ benefits on his […]

This verse in Scripture cannot be more compelling or clearer: “Pure and undefiled religion before our God and Father is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress and to keep oneself unstained by the world.” (James 1:27)   Scholars have produced massive volumes on the biblical mandate to care for orphans and widows. The Bible is not ambiguous on this topic. I am grateful churches around the world have taken some steps to care for the orphans, though much more remains to be done. But, in North American churches, I see hardly any intentional church wide ministries […]